I don’t write anything on here that I don’t mind someone from my present or past or future reading. I have learned secrets can be deadly and only cause more harm than good. I find it hilarious to think people believe they can keep their lives private when they post online — who do they think they are kidding?? Online blogging isn’t really private. If you want a private journal, write it out by hand.
Some of us are just more internet savy than others… and curious… and others are just more naive… especially when posting online. Finding someone isn’t stalking someone.
Running away doesn’t make the past go away or suddenly make the past perfect. Dealing with something by running away accomplishes nothing in a mature manner. Face it or leave.
Personal relationships and privacy
Do not assume that you know everything there is to know about me simply because you read what I write. Any judgements you make will be based on the information I share with you about me, which is probably vague, incomplete or embellished. Whatever opinion you form on me as an individual, or my life as a whole, is probably best kept to yourself. Remember, you are the reader and I am the writer. An obvious exception to this would be if I were asking for your advice and or opinions.
Never contact me for more details on events or personal information than than what I have written about. Chances are if the information you seek isn’t readily available or I believe it too personal or innapropriate to share under these circumstances and or in this format. If you are close to me, I’ll eventually tell you in private if I want to talk about it further, so intrusive questions will be viewed as simply inappropriate, so just leave it as it stands. If you are meant to know, you will. Please respect my boundaries.
If you know me in real life, remember that communicating with me is very important outside of this blog and this blog is just another insight you have into how I am perceiving life in the moment. View my blog as an online journal, no less sacred than a diary hidden between the mattresses. First of all let me know that you read my site (either my email or by comment), especially if I have not shared this link personally with you. If you have found a link to my blog on a website or forum and have become a regular reader, please let me know. Sometimes I like to know who is listening…
If I don’t want you reading something, or suddenly stop posting entries you can read, talk to me personally about why if this becomes a concern of yours. There are people I have blocked based on IP addresss for harassment and or inappropriate comments already, but this is not something I enjoy doing at all… so please don’t encouarge me to make this a habit. It is important that as my friend, relative, co-worker or whatever you may be to me in real life or in the virtual world, that your presence here not impede my ability to express myself. Remember this is one of my outlets and it is about me, for me – not for you. I may not want you to read certain things I might write about you or others you care about, in order to spare feelings, or to avoid drama or maintain privacy… but this is not my norm. I generally speak my mind, yet I do believe in maintaining privacy and confidentiality at all costs. You should respect this and immediately stop going to my site if you cannot take on the responsibility necessary to read and keep to yourself. NEVER share any information you gather here to others who might use this information in a negative way. Drama is not my goal and this is not gossip central for Cassandra, this is a branch for my self-expression.
If I write about you and you don’t appreciate it, tell me. Try to remain calm and polite. Explain that you are entitled to your privacy as well – I respect privacy and I will immediately address the issue. There are many compromises that can be reached from using vague nicknames to protect your anonymity, or not mentioning you at all. If you are upset because I’m writing negative things about you, be reasonable, try to see if there is a way to resolve the issues and or mend your relationship with me. Don’t hold in your feelings of discomfort if I am doing something that violates you. If that doesn’t seem to be possible, stop reading for a while — my whole life does not and will not forever revolve around YOU, so don’t worry because I’ll move on.
Ex-friends, lovers and estranged family members who are no longer a part of my life can read my blog if they wish. It is totally your choice whether or not to read my blog and if you find me, want information, then read away… just beware that with information, comes responsiblity. If you fail to act with responsiblity, I will take action and I will act responsibly with the information I have about you.
Feedback and initiating contact
Compliments will always be graciously accepted and appreciated. Criticisms and reproaches are fine if you have a problem with something, but try to remain constructive and contextually appropriate. No one is forcing you to give out your opinions, so if you don’t have anything remotely positive to say, it may be best to keep quiet.
When contacting me for the first time, have a clue about me – take the time to read what I have written and understand the context of what I have shared about myself online. I drop clues about myself constantly and if someone from my real life stumbles across this blog, they would more than likely pick me out. I’m more open here than I am in my “public private life”, however I explore multiple locations and circumstances and fantasies and occurances here… when in real life, the context often limits what I share. I do put a lot of thought and time into my blog, so take the time to read the information I have shared with you with before you start being nosey for more.
Never assume a I owe you any response to a comment or email. I usually write back, just not always immediately. Try not to take it personally because chances are that it has more to do with my schedule than anything else. If you get upset and nasty about feeling rejected, you will probably ruin any chances you had of befriending me. I don’t need any more enemies.
Don’t delude yourself into thinking that you will be as important me as I am to you. Remember, you are peering in on a slice of my life, sharing in the thoughts I have carefully chosen to express aloud, and though I may become quite special to you… you mostly remain a mystery to me… as I may or may not be reading a blog you have, you might be a stranger from another world, or you might not nearly as open with me as I have chosen to be with you and my other readers. If I’m cold or unreceptive to your advances, keep in mind that you are a stranger to me at this point, and I may or may not want to keep it that way. It’s entirely up to me and I will keep it this way… but overall, I’m very friendly and enjoy interacting with everyone and anyone who takes the time to comment with thought. I enjoy interaction with my readers and I encourage it.
I have the right to stop writing at any time for any reason I see fit, and at no point must I justify or explain these reasons to you or any of their readers. It’s MY weblog, I can and will do with it as I feel necessary.
Offensive language and materials
The internet is a place that encourages free and creative expression, and as in any environment where people are given this freedom, conflict may arise. If I uses language or materials that offend you, please leave quitely. Contacting me or their isp, demanding that I remove the content or change my ways is absurd because you are viewing MY content of your own free will by visiting MY site. Simply stop going there and you won’t have to see whatever it is you don’t like about the site. An obvious exception to this would be if someone were providing illegal materials, in which case it would be appropriate to complain to their isp or contact authorities.
Copyright and courtesy
Never use anything off my site, be it writing, images or html code, unless I have given you permission to do otherwise. Copyright is protected by law and in effect the minute something is created, whether the author has a © notice or not. There are online tools where you can learn about copyright laws like What is Copyright?and Redistribution In Graphics Has To Stop.
Under no circumstances should you ever direct link anything, this includes link buttons and any other graphics of mine. Direct linking is when you type something like 
to display the yahoo link button, instead of actually saving it and uploading it on to your server. It is essentially bandwidth theft, because it uses data transfer, and the owner of the server has to pay for it. Always save the image and upload it to your own server unless the author specifically states you can do otherwise.
You can link to my blog, mention my blog, and reference my blog all you wish — just put a link to the post you are referring to… give your reader some context to refer to, not just a person’s name or the idea a “friend online was talking about”. Context is very important to me and I don’t want my words minced, so use them correctly.
For the record, I screen all comments – however I do allow ANYONE to comment, so feel free to tell me what you think. If I see it as appropriate, well thought, and or applicable to the post/ situation/ big picture (meaning you did not just read one post and jump to conclusions) — you will see it on my blog. Thanks.
(Part of this was taken from A Blogger’s Disclaimer, which was found on a fellow blogger’s website Audacious Aria. It has been modified and combined with two of the pages I previously composed related to thinking before you comment and my overall disclaimer.)
