I couldn’t give K. my tools today. I needed to talk with her first and that wasn’t possible, so I took my tools home AGAIN. I need to get rid of my tools desperately, but I need to talk about what I’m doing to help myself process it all.
Fuck recovery. I can’t [...]
Archive for the ‘eating disorder’ Category
I’m fucking pissed off
Posted in bulimia, eating disorder, self-injury, tagged binge, cut, purge, talk, tools on February 22, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Finding a little hope here and there
Posted in coping, eating disorder, faith, friends, honesty, lessons learned, recovery, self-injury, tagged conversation, divine intervention, evidence, faith, grace, hope, humility, introspective, journey, logic, love, motive, obedience, process, reason, understanding, victory on January 2, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
The conversation I had this morning with K. was hopeful and encouraging. We spoke of uncomfortable matters and silly things and dreams and aspriations and hopes. She brought up a few situations where I felt uncomfortable and I am almost positive I did the same for her, yet we somehow worked through it… [...]
Quick lunch – not eating – blah
Posted in angry, anorexia, control, coping, food, friends, honesty, weight, work, tagged death, drinking water, druink, exercise, fat, hunger, law office, lunch, New Year's Eve, promotion, RSD, stomach, stupidity on December 31, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I came home on lunch rather than sitting in the break room. My mind is spinning, my thighs feel fat, and I’m starving. I’m doing pretty well with the no gluten and no soda’s while at work; water is even going down easier. Quiet time hasn’t really happened much besides listening to [...]
Some realistic goals for 2009
Posted in anorexia, boundaries, bulimia, change, control, crochet, eating disorder, faith, food, honesty, palm, recovery, self-confidence, self-injury, self-worth, weight, tagged 2009, caffeine, exercise, floss, gluten-free, goals, going green, quiet time, reflex sympathetic dystrophy, resolutions, RSD, soda pop, water on December 28, 2008 | 3 Comments »
I wrote earlier on faith, which felt liberating. After writing here, I then had enough of my cobwebs out to compose a heartfelt and honest email on faith to a friend — now all I must do is await her reply.
Anyhow, I didn’t really speak of any specific goals last time because… well… it [...]
My little annoyances…
Posted in angry, annoyed, anorexia, bulimia, eating disorder, food, fuck off, tagged fake, immature, password, protect on December 15, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Humpf… I had to make a rational decision today – to password protect the most *popular* entry in my journal because the fine print wasn’t being respected, muchless read, by the desperate assholes reading and following it like a book.
I don’t like to password protect ANYTHING on this blog. I would rather password [...]
What the heck I’ve been up to…
Posted in braces, depressed, discouraged, eating disorder, exhausted, faith, feelings, finances, frustrated, honesty, lessons learned, orthodontics, recovery, relationships, scared, self-injury, stress, suicide, unemployed, work, tagged bills, cleaning, friendship, grocery store, new job, profanity, roommate, stitches on December 11, 2008 | 4 Comments »
Yeah, well… I’m a changed woman! My life has been more of a whirlwind these last few months than much of anything else. Not totally sure what to make of the mess I have made and others have made, but I’m trying to turn that around and focus a little more on faith.
We [...]
