I need distance right now. I’m in a “freak out mode” and I’m feeling myself lock up within my skin. I’m not able to respond to what my sponsor has posted in response to things I have posted… and I don’t feel as though I can write to her about what is going [...]
Archive for the ‘boundaries’ Category
Distance
Posted in boundaries, coping, friends, fuck off, honesty, loneliness, privacy, recovery, relationships, scared, self hate, self-injury, self-mutilation, shame, tagged AA, anger, cutting, fuck it, invisible, looney bin, mental hospital, secret, sponsor, stitches on February 10, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Week from hell…
Posted in angry, anxiety, boundaries, braces, control, faith, friends, honesty, lessons learned, orthodontics, recovery, relationships, self-injury, work, tagged debanding, emotions, Friday, God, hell, hygenist, Monday, music, orthodontist, pink eye, powerchains, sponsor, Sunday, telephone, Thursday, Tuesday, Wednesday on February 7, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
My last entry was actually a draft that I wrote up mid-week and thought I would publish — it makes me laugh now that I look at it/ read it! It was written on Wednesday, I think, as that was the first day I left work in complete tears… threatening to never come back [...]
Some realistic goals for 2009
Posted in anorexia, boundaries, bulimia, change, control, crochet, eating disorder, faith, food, honesty, palm, recovery, self-confidence, self-injury, self-worth, weight, tagged exercise, water, floss, RSD, reflex sympathetic dystrophy, goals, 2009, resolutions, soda pop, caffeine, quiet time, gluten-free, going green on December 28, 2008 | 3 Comments »
I wrote earlier on faith, which felt liberating. After writing here, I then had enough of my cobwebs out to compose a heartfelt and honest email on faith to a friend — now all I must do is await her reply.
Anyhow, I didn’t really speak of any specific goals last time because… well… it [...]
Starting over in 2009
Posted in angry, boundaries, change, coping, crochet, faith, friends, guilt, honesty, lessons learned, orthodontics, privacy, recovery, relationships, self-injury, self-worth, shame, stress, suicide, understanding, work, tagged Bible, cell phone, compassion, emergency room, future, grace, love, mistakes, scars, smile, stitches, vote on December 28, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
Sometimes a sermon really gets to me and today I heard one of those sermons – it was straight to the point, no candy coating, and hit home in places I wasn’t quite ready to explore… yet I’m needing to explore… so I’m typing my thoughts out I can get a better grasp of them.
According [...]
My hands…
Posted in boundaries, feelings, love, pain, scared, tagged change, create, hands, harm, heal, love, potential, push, scarred, secrets, touched on August 14, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
My hands hold many secrets.
My hands hold much potential.
My hands hold my thoughts.
My hands hold up my walls.
My hands have caused so much harm to me.
My hands have created many things.
My hands have touched pain.
My hands have held life.
My hands are scared.
My hands are wounded.
My hands are scarred.
My hands are my boundaries.
My hands can heal.
My [...]
Chronic heaviness
Posted in angry, annoyed, anxiety, avoidance, boundaries, coping, depressed, discouraged, exhausted, family, feelings, friends, hugs, insomnia, pain, sleep, stress, tagged ankle, chronic pain, coworkers, emotional, heavy, jaw, teasing, teeth, walls on August 13, 2008 | Leave a Comment »
I can’t sleep because I start worrying about having to wake up. Insomina lasts forever when the pain overwhelms me to the point where I can’t sleep. I become anxious and tired and “heavy”.
Right now I’m confused as to what day of the week it is. I’m always awake it [...]
